Sooo... Since I didn't get you a post in time for Thursday, I'm going to give you two at 3 in the morning, and then I'll give you another one tomorrow. Sound fair? Yeah, whatever, just pretend like you understand my logic.

1. Shun and avoid the employment of unnecessary, excess extra words.
2. Make certain all sentences are full and complete. If possible.
3. Avoid cliches like the plague.
4. Take pain's to spell and, punctuate correctly.
5. BE Consistent.
6. Don't approximate. Always be more or less precise.
7. Sedulously eschew obfuscatory hypervobosity or prolixity.
8. Avoid pointless repition, and don't repeat yourself unnecessarily.
9. Always try to remember t he/E extreme importance of being accurit; ne at, and carfful.
10. Don't use no double negatives.
11. Don't never use no triple negatives.
12. All generalizations are bad.
13. Take care that your verb and subject is in agreement.
14. A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.
15. Don't use commas, which aren't necessary.
16. "Avoid overuse of 'quotation' marks."
17. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
18. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
19. Reserve the apostropphe for it's proper use and omit it when its not necessary.
20. Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.
21. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
22. Never use that totally cool, radically groovy out-of-date slang.
23. Avoid those long sentences that just go on, and on, they never stop, they just keep rambling, and you really wish the person would just shut up, but no, they just keep on going, they're worse than the Energizer Bunny, they babble incessantly, and these sentences, they just never stop.

So, there you have it, the rules to good writing!

Gramatically yours,

The Hot Girl in the Comic Shop

I totally stole this from http://donstuff.wordpress.com/2008/10/09/, who actually sited his source correctly. Thanks to him, for posting this brilliant piece!